Tag Archives: Boys

It’s All About Perspective

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MTHFR.  No, I’m not trying to curse, although I’ll admit that mother ****er has slipped from my mouth on more than one occasion.

MTHFR, unheard of by me until a week and a half ago now takes on a new, unpronouncable meaning:  Methylenetetrahydrofolate Reductase.  I have it.

At the end of July Dave and I found out we were pregnant again.  After having our first two pregnancies end in miscarriage earlier this year, we chose to keep this one relatively quiet.  Weeks of all-day morning sickness passed, and in mid-August we were able to see a very small baby at our first ultrasound.  We were elated!  This was more than we had ever seen with the other two, and although they couldn’t hear the heartbeat (the technician said it was too early) we had scheduled another ultrasound for two weeks later.

Unfortunately, God had other plans for us again.  Within a week of the ultrasound I started spotting, and on September 4, we had our third miscarriage at 12 weeks.

Dave and I were exhausted.  We are blessed to each already have children whom we love with everything we’ve got.  With that said, however, we would love to have a child together, a child who can bask in our love and enjoy a life where mom and dad love each other and will share the rest of their lives with each other.  No split custody, no hard decisions to make on holidays, no absentee parent.  We decided to give our emotions and my body a break and cease trying for a bit, however before my doctor would put me on birth control he wanted to run blood tests to see if there was a root cause for the miscarriages.

So, three weeks ago I had 24 vials of blood taken.  24.  And the results came in positive except for one test which showed I have the MTHFR gene mutation.  I looked it up on the internet (and honestly still don’t totally understand what I’m reading), and basically it means that my body isn’t absorbing folate.  With folic acid so crucially important to a developing fetus, this isn’t good.

This Monday Dave and I went to my hematologist appointment.  For me especially, the time waiting in the reception area shared by oncology put everything in perspective.  Here we were, fretting over why we couldn’t keep a pregnancy, and we were surrounded by patients in all stages of cancer treatment.  Bandanas covered their heads, sores  were hidden by bandages, and the wear and tear of chemo was written all over so many of their faces.  I felt suddenly…  Fortunate…

While we may not be getting what we want, Dave and I aren’t being dealt what we don’t want.  We’re healthy.  Our children are healthy.  We’ve got a roof over our heads, food in our cabinets, and a job to pay the bills.  Dave’s college education is very successfully underway and courtesy of the U.S. military/government, and our cars are running.

And our house is full of love.  Lots of love.

So while I may want to have a child with Dave, I don’t need anything.  I am blessed with everything I need to live a happy, peaceful life.  For that I must remember to thank God each and every day.  He will give us what we need, when the time is right.

“Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act.” ~Psalm 37:7

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Thing 1 and Thing 2

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From time to time I’ve been asked why I refer to our boys as Thing 1 and Thing 2 on my blog or on Facebook.  While at first it was to protect the boys from the social media stalkers of the world, the reasons go a little bit deeper:

1.  Yes, the base is to protect them from the social media stalkers and potential kidnappers who could possibly harm them.  Do I have a real concern of this happening to them?  No.  However should someone try, it will be harder to lure one of my boys to the car by calling them “Thing 1” or “Thing 2” rather than his real name.  We have taught them about Stranger Danger, however who knows what would happen if presented with a bag of their favorite treats.  These two are too priceless to take the chance.

Things 1 and 2 with Coolest Dad Ever

2.  I share my birthday with Dr. Seuss.  While it would be easy to ignore this, I LOVE Dr. Seuss and will draw influence from him wherever possible.

Thing 1 and Thing 2. Buy your copy of Cat in the Hat at Amazon.com!

3.  Calling the boys Thing 1 and Thing 2 allows me that extra half-second to remember their real names.  Yes, I only have two boys.  But once in a while I still stumble over who I’m talking to or about.  Thus, I allow myself that Thing… 1 moment!

4.  The boys, although complete sweethearts, can trash our house in less than an hour.  They can get home from school to a clean house, and within a half hour we can find homework strewn across the kitchen, game controller cords laced across the living room like a laser maze, and coats and shoes thrown on the floor as if their attempt to a make a fort out of them collapsed.  That’s not to mention the clothes they leave on the floor in their bedroom and bathroom, the dirty dishes they leave on the table as if we have a waitress, and their speedy movement (Thing 2) or mouths (both).

5.  They can aggravate the heck out of us, but we still love them.

Don’t Point!

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As a child, I was taught not to point.  I was told it was rude, but honestly, I never understood why.  No, I didn’t like my sisters sticking their fingers in my face (if it ever happened I don’t remember), but for the ease of pointing out something in the distance, I couldn’t understand why sticking out my index finger was such a problem.

As a parent, I’ve had to teach my boys not to point.  Pointing has never really been an issue with Thing 2, however with Thing 1…  Well…  When he started pointing it was with his middle finger rather than his index finger.

“Look, mommy!” he would yell in the middle of somewhere public.  Simultaneously his middle finger would pop up and point across a crowded restaurant or grocery store.  I would get the look of distaste from grown-ups all around me, and a raised eyebrow indicating they were wondering what other select gestures I had taught my son.

None, people.  Those select gestures are all him.

Pointing really wasn’t an issue in my house for the past couple of years until…  We got Beezley.  A trailer park treasure, Beezley is trouble all the way.  Upon finding him on the counter a few months back, Dave pointed at him and directed him to get down.  His direction was answered by a swift swing at his finger and a refusal to move.  Over time Beezley’s distaste for Dave’s pointer finger has increased to the point (no pun intended) that he will leap feet off the ground in effort to claw it.

So for all you parents trying to teach your children not to point, show them this video.  Tell them not to point or the kitty with claws may get them.

Our Laundry Fairy Was Kidnapped

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I hope she’s ok.  But’s she’s definitely been kidnapped.  Our laundry fairy…  She’s GONE!

How do I know she’s been kidnapped?  I have a few pieces of evidence:

1.  There are piles of clean laundry to be folded on the living room chairs.  Big piles.

2.  A load of wash was left in the washing machine for more than a day.

3.  The lint trap had lint in it.

4.  I found the boys’ socks in their beds, in between sofa cushions and on the floor.

5.  There’s dirty laundry on the bathroom floor.

I hope our laundry fairy is okay and being taken care of.  If you see her, please tell her I’ll rescue her as soon as possible.

School Age Kids and Saturday Mornings

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The last two years has been a bit of an adjustment for me.  Even outside of how my life changed marriage wise (separated, divorced and then re-married), and career wise, I didn’t expect so many other changes and adjustments.  Most specifically, I’m talking about Saturday mornings.

When I had my boys, I quickly realized that sleeping in was a thing of the past.  Six a.m. breast feeding sessions turned into 7 a.m. rattlings on the crib, and later one or both of them climbing into bed with me.  As they got older, they learned to get up and turn on the T.V. and fix themself a bowl of cereal.  With the hope of one of Dave’s all-star breakfasts, however, it’s hit-or-miss as to whether or not they will take the cereal or knock on our door until we wake up, in hopes of french toast or omelettes.  Yea, our Breakfasts with the Beatles are THAT good.

In the past year we have had the biggest change to our Saturday mornings.  This one is probably the hardest to adjust to…  Sports.  While waking up and stumbling to the kitchen to get coffee and relax on a Saturday morning is one thing, having to set the alarm to make sure we’re at the field early enough is an entirely different playing field.

Our Saturday mornings have turned into another workday morning.

Instead of asking, “Do you have your shoes, homework and lunch?” I find myself repeatedly asking, “Where are your shinguards, uniform and cleats?”  It’s exhausting!  While I appreciate the fact that our Saturdays are ours after the games are over, I know I’m not alone once we get to the field.  Sitting in our lawn chairs, we’re surrounded by parents who look beat up.  Our massive thermoses filled with coffee should have an IV into our bloodstream, and as our kids sweat it out on the field, we struggle to stay warm on the sidelines.  With our pale faces and bags under our eyes, we look like a sad group that’s been up all night drinking rather than a segment of the population that could just use a nap.  Or a vacation.

So here I am at 9:03 Saturday morning.  My coffee is next to me on the desk and the air is cold thanks to a night of rain and thunderstorms.  But the game is still on.  And I’ll be on the soccer field sidelines in less than an hour, cheering Thing 2 on and hoping for a win.  However when the game is finished, the day belongs to the parents (she says with a sinister laugh).  There’s laundry to be done, a sink full of dishes and trash to take out.  Well…  OK.  Maybe Saturday afternoons don’t belong to the parents either.  Maybe they belong to all the chores and tasks that weren’t done during the week.

Here’s hope for Sunday.

Impromptu Mid-Day Vacation

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At the end of the school year/beginning of summer, the boys’ daycare sent home a stack of field trip forms for us to sign.  Ranging from (multiple) visits to a nearby nursing home or the local Lowe’s to build a birdhouse, Dave and my interest was peaked by a field trip to Ohio Caverns.  Right away we knew Thing 2 would LOVE it, as he collects rocks and is very curious about what he can do when he grows up that involves rocks.  My mind gets excited thinking about the corners of the world he’ll be able to see if he pursues geography, archeology or any other fields that I’m not smart enough to know about.

Right away Dave expressed interest in accompanying the boys on their Ohio Caverns field trip, as the form clearly stated parents were invited.  Despite being radically right brained, I, too was interested, however the thought of not getting paid for half a day made me squash the thought of me going really fast.  As time went on, Dave finished his second session at school and entered his third (which he is currently in) and got bogged down with a LOT of school-work.  I’m proud of him for his dedication as well as the awesome art he is producing.  Anyway, his work-load made it doubtful that he would be able to go.

I was sitting at my desk around 8am yesterday morning, thinking about how the boys were about to go on their field trip.  I stared at my Excel spreadsheet and out of nowhere got hit with a F*** this smack.  It was as if I was taken over by the slacker sitting on my right shoulder.  After a quick (pleasant) conversation with my boss I was given permission to take a half-day, mid-day, vacation and accompany the boys.  I called Dave, told him we’re going because I’d rather spend the day with my gentlemen than think about how I should’ve later, and left work.

As written on the Ohio Caverns website,

Concealed beneath the rolling farmland and wooded countryside of Champaign County, Ohio, the caverns were formed thousands of years ago when an underground river cut through ancient limestone and created vast rooms and passageways that later filled with countless crystal stalactites, stalagmites and other amazing formations.

You can read more about the history on their website, as I want to share some of my pictures…

Ohio Caverns - 2
Ohio Caverns - 3

98 Degrees and 3,724 Words

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I slept in this morning (10am!) and when I finally reached my computer at 10:40am, the Weather.com toolbar app said…  93 Degrees in bright red.  Living in Ohio, I never expected to go through days, much less weeks, at a time with temperatures consistantly over 95.  I like the summer.  I like swimming, sunflowers, and miniature golf.  I do not, however, like sweaty boobs.  (Yes, I said sweaty boobs)Now my weather.com tool is blessing us with an excessive heat warning (heat index up to 110 Degrees) and it looks like this…

Despite the fact that Dave and I have the boys this weekend and we always like to do something fun with them, we made the executive “Team Awesome” decision that today is an inside day.  Games/movies/reading (for the boys), homework (for Dave) and writing (Me) are all that will really be accomplished, outside of the mandatory eating and chores. This, to me, is an awesome change of pace.  I’m enjoying watching Dave work on Adobe Illustrator, as he’s less than a week into using the program and he’s already blowing my mind with what he’s doing.  Perhaps at some point he will let me post some of his stuff on here.

For me, I have a goal.  I would like to get to 5,000 words minimum on my book.  Considering I’m starting the day with 3,724 and this blog post is already 230 words long, I don’t think it should be an issue.  For once, I have a steady stream of ideas, and I know where I want to go.  I have questions, however, which are troubling and hinder my creativity despite the fact that they have nothing to do with the storyline.

  • Should I be double-spacing?
  • Should the pages be formatted for a certain size?
  • Should I bother putting the header/footer on the pages now?
  • What do I want the cover to look like?
  • How long will the copyright process take?
  • Who can I get to proof-read the story?
  • Is the book even worth my time to write?  (I’m enjoying the process, however will anyone want to read it?)

I wonder if Stephanie Meyer, J.K. Rowling or Robert Jordan ever had any of these thoughts?  I know I’m writing my book for self-publication specifically for e-Readers which they probably weren’t worried about/focused on at all, however I would love to know what thoughts passed through their minds as they were writing.